Baby is home...now what?

Once you are home with your baby it is pretty crazy. I think when you are a new mom it is so hard because you really have no idea what you are doing and you don't have those little tricks up your sleeve. So, the first trick I found was the boppy. I loved the boppy the first few weeks and didn't think there was a better product out there. I didn't really use it for breast feeding, but I did put Maggie on it (or in it...however you want to look at it) to sleep. The books and doctors say that the baby must sleep on their back. You don't want to suffocate your baby by placing her on her stomach and putting them on their back reduces the risk of SIDS. I tried having Maggie sleep on her back, but she didn't do all that well. She woke up frequently and seemed uncomfortable. That is when I tried the boppy. I would swaddle her up and place her on the boppy and she slept great. I would even put the boppy in her crib or pack n play and place her on top at night. I think she liked having her head elevated and I liked that she slept! So, just when I was comfortable with that she changed her style (I hear that happens a lot). She stopped liking the boppy. Now what? In the hospital I noticed the nurse had swaddled her (they do that perfectly by the way) and then would prop her on her side with a rolled blanket wedged behind her. She wasn't completely on her side, but wasn't on her back either. I started doing that at home and that worked great. Ultimately I bought a sleep positioner to keep Maggie from pushing the rolled blanket out and falling on her back. 3 months later and I still use the sleep positioner. She sleeps great and I guess just likes being on her side. I do switch sides from day to day, but she is getting these slight bald spots on the side of her head! Oh well...at least she sleeps!

Nursing

I'm sure I will write a lot about this topic since it's all I do (or feels like anyway), but the very first time nursing is quite the experience. Right after Maggie was born (I mean within minutes) they had me try to breast feed. It's crazy because you've just had the baby (which you are trying to process) and then they want you to feed her (which is difficult anyway) and the room is full of chaos. Maggie did pretty well latching on, but I did use the nipple shield in the beginning. Nursing in the hospital was hard because your milk hasn't come in yet and Maggie was starving. The nursing wasn't really cutting it. Maggie was also jaundice. They say the way for the jaundice to go away is for your baby to eat so that she can poop and that the poop will help pass the bilirubin (which causes the jaundice). They will also do light therapy if needed. I think most babies are jaundice, but when you are a new mom (and have no idea what you are doing) the jaundice seems like a big deal. Since Maggie wasn't getting much food from me, the lactation consultant said that feeding a bottle of formula might get her digestive system going. This would help with the jaundice and also a hungry baby. So, I fed Maggie a bottle (2 oz) and she gulped it down. She was so content afterwards that you realized just how hungry she was. I do have to say that when the pediatrician came in and checked Maggie out she stressed me out a little bit. She told me to stay away from the formula and that my body is making enough for Maggie to live on (she didn't want to risk nipple confusion). There were such conflicting theories from the doctors, lactation consultants and even the nurses. I went with what I felt was right and that was feeding Maggie a few bottles of formula during those first days before my milk came in (it actually took 5 days to come in). Maggie ate and was satisfied and ultimately I didn't have any problem with nipple confusion. I nursed too, so that she (and me too) could get some practice in. I had a happy little girl and that made for a happy mama because I wasn't freaking out over a hungry little baby!

Hospital Stay

I pushed for two hours before Maggie was born. It went very smooth, but I'm glad Kaleb was there to take it all in. I felt exhausted and in a bit of a daze. Kaleb was recording the first few minutes after she was born and I'm so grateful he did. I didn't want a video of the actual birth, but I love seeing her being weighed by the nurse and measured too. It really surreal at that point. You are so tired and you really can't believe what had just happened. Soon enough Maggie was on my chest and I was meeting her and looking her over. That is one life changing moment! The next 24hours were crazy. I had started labor at 10pm on April 29th and Maggie was born at 10am on April 30th. I had already been up over 24 hours because I had worked all day too. After she was born they wheeled me over to my recovery room (the room I would stay in for the duration). That is when the people train began. We had family and friends stopping by all day. Maggie pretty much slept, but the doctors and nurses and lactation consultants came and went. I did get a chance to take a shower (best feeling ever) and soon enough it was 8pm. I had now been up about 40 hours. What I did next will be different from what most moms do. I decided to send my husband home and the baby to the nursery for the entire night. Kaleb snores (loud) and if he was sleeping on the couch I wouldn't be able to nudge him quiet like I do at home. He was exhausted too, so I figured we would both sleep better if he went home. As far as the baby went, she went to the nursery around 10 and they brought her back at 5am. They asked if I wanted her to come in for the 1 am feeding or if they should feed her a bottle in the nursery. I had them feed her. The way I looked at it was, I'm exhausted and in the long run Maggie will be just fine if I get sleep and she gets a bottle. They also asked if I wanted to go home on May 1st or stay until the 2nd. I chose to stay another night and did the same thing in regards to sleeping/baby in nursery/husband at home...those were my last two great nights of sleep!

Epidural

The epidural was the best and worst part of the labor. Once they moved me from triage to the labor room they asked if I wanted my epidural. The nurse basically said that if I'm getting it anyway why should I wait until the pain gets worse. I saw her logic and said yes to the epidural. My doctor had already instructed the nurses to start Pitocin. It also seemed like standard practice (with my doctor anyway) to use Pitocin no matter what. Maybe this was because I had planned on the epidural and that can slow contractions. The nurse also said that once they gave me the Pitocin the contractions would get strong fast and that it was a good idea to have the epidural before they started that. The anesthesiologist must a been a newbie! He had an extremely hard time getting the needle in the right spot. He had to try many times and that pain was terrible. I was squeezing Kaleb's fingers just about off and when a contraction hit too...I thought I was going to die. Finally he gets it in, but shortly after my entire right side was dead numb. The left side was a little numb, but I could still move my leg around. I did not like that feeling plus it made me nautious. When the nurse came back to check my dilation I was at a 10. We decided to try and start pushing, but because I was so numb I couldn't lift my legs or feel the contractions. Kaleb was helping lift my leg, but it felt to me like a 300lb blob. The nurse suggested we reduce the epidural and give it a little while until I got some feeling back. After a couple of hours I had some feeling back and then it was really time...at least I had no pain!

The Hospital

Our hospital was about 15 minutes away from our house. Banner Gateway is a newer hospital and is very nice. They have a great maternity ward complete with gardens, sitting areas, nice restaurant/cafeteria and cute shop. The private maternity garden even had funky labor tools/swings. Again, the tour helped explain everything, but I knew the epidural would prevent me from walking around the gardens during labor. I also wasn't going to need those swings and stretching devices because I planned to have my own little zen party right in my bed! More about the epidural later. My contractions were getting stronger and stronger all the way to the hospital. I was nervous and excited and even texted a girlfriend or two telling them I was in labor. When we parked the car and got out my water burst. I thought it had already broken at home, but that was just small leaking compared to what happened in the hospital parking lot. So, now we are walking in the hospital doors (they had to buzz us in because it was after hours) and I looked like I just peed everywhere. I wasn't too worried since it was 12:15am, but sure enough the entire waiting room/lobby was full of people (it was all of the inductions that got bumped). I was a little embarrassed, but what could I do? They checked me into triage and examined to see how dilated I was...4cm! That is when the nurse said, "you are having a baby today" and that is when Kaleb said, "Maggie Mae will be born in April instead of May," like we had planned...she was one week early.

It's Time!!

My water broke when I was at home (thank god for that). It was around 10pm on 4/29/10. We had been watching the Suns play in the finals and had our friend over to BBQ and watch the game. Around 9:30 or so I decided to go get ready for bed and read a while. As I was laying there I felt the gush. Now, I had been reading about that moment, praying for it to happen, but I still wasn't prepared for it. I called in my husband, Kaleb,(I was now sitting on the toilet)and said, "I think my water just broke!" He kicked our friend out...well it didn't take much force. He was up and out of there as soon as he heard what was going on. "Congrats and let me know how it goes," was what he said on his way out. My husband then started running around getting the rest of what we needed. My cousin had told us that they were so busy thinking about her and what the baby would need that they forgot to pack anything for dad. One of the things they wished they had was a sweatshirt for dad in the hospital. So, remembering that, Kaleb put his sweatshirt on and continued to pack. After a few minutes Kaleb was sweating like crazy. I told him that I think he could wait to put the sweatshirt on once we got to the hospital. My contractions still hadn't started. Fluid continued to leak, but no real contractions. I was expecting to have contractions and not really know when it was time to go to the hospital, but since it was my water that broke first I knew we had to go. We left the house around 12am and on the way to the hospital my contractions began. They felt like strong period cramps. They were uncomfortable, but not unbearable...not yet anyway!

What to bring to the hospital

There are many things you can bring and others may be able to give their suggestions too. I think the very best thing we had was our IPOD. During the entire labor we were able to listen to different songs. It helped pass the time and relaxed us. Plus we'll always be able to tell our daughter that Prince (Purple Rain) was playing when she was born! We named our daughter Maggie Mae, so you would think we would of had Rod Stewart on, but we were preoccupied! Be sure to bring your own shampoo and conditioner because they don't have any there. You'll love taking that first shower. Bring a robe. You'll be wearing this gown that is all open and you will want to get up and walk around. People will be stopping by, so the robe (make it a cute one) will keep you together. Plus the nurses will need to check you down there and they like easy access! If you do bring your own pjs, make sure they are maternity wear. Just because you had a baby you will not be skinny. Plus you will be wearing these diaper things packed with ice. You'll need lots of room. The nursing cami works great as a top. You'll be nursing a lot and it was nice to wear something that looked normal and that you didn't have to wear a bra with. I got mine at Motherhood Maternity, but Target has cheap ones too. Gals who have C-sections probably have other advice on clothes in the hospital, so maybe one of them can give some tips. Other things you may want are, magazines, socks, makeup, and most importantly don't forget the camera!! Ours had the ability to take video and that was awesome. We have video just as our daughter was born! Priceless!

Birthing Class

I would recommend the birthing classes. A lot of it was boring, but they did show a live birth and I hadn't seen that since 7th grade health class. My husband freaked out when they showed the delivery of the after birth. He had no idea that happened. It is big and pretty gory looking, but we did have a good idea of what to expect. I planned on having an epidural (the second they would give it to me) and I felt the class was more geared towards women doing a natural childbirth without drugs. I think the videos just reinforced my decision to have the epidural. My husband did have to put on a weighted pregnancy vest. The instructor had him lay on the floor, get up and tie his shoes with it on. I think he got a fraction of what it was really like, but making him look goofy was really the best part. The instructor also had us practice breathing and relaxing. She told us to find 'our happy place,' but my happy place was video poker at the casino with a vodka soda! I don't think that is what she had in mind. We were given ideas of what to bring to the hospital and given a tour of the maternity ward. The tour was great and we were told exactly where to go when it was time. A tour is a must, so even if you don't do your classes at the hospital then I would stop in for a look see.

Maternity Clothes

Everyone told me that "maternity clothes are so much cuter than when I was pregnant." That might be true, but who wants to buy them? I held off on buying maternity clothes for way too long. I went to visit a girlfriend in Sacramento when I was six months pregnant and I was wearing big sweaters that I had in my closet. She, a mother of two, convinced me to go maternity clothes shopping. Once I gave in and bought the pants with panels and tops with the side rouging, I finally got it. Don't hide the pregnancy...embrace it! You will look like a cute pregnant girl rather than a frumpy overweight girl. Plus you won't believe how much more comfortable you are. I will definitely wear the maternity clothes much sooner on my next one. I bought most of my clothes at Target or Kohls because it was cheap, but also got some things from Motherhood. A couple of girlfriends passed their maternity wear on to me and that helped a ton. Here is what I suggest - borrow what you can, find a good pair of jeans (you'll wear the heck out of them), and when you have to buy bigger bras - get nursing ones so that you can use them once the baby is born!

Pregnancy!

Pregnancy was, for the most part, enjoyable. I did not have any morning sickness and loved eating anything I wanted! I was very tired the first trimester and that lead into being a home body. I'm a very social person and that part of me changed during pregnancy. I stayed home all the time and now I am addicted to all "The Housewives" reality shows. I still Tivo them! I think they call that nesting, but I think it was me just missing my Chardonnay! Once I had Maggie the social part came back, but so did the wine! The very worst part of pregnancy was the last month or so...I swelled up like a balloon. Shoes didn't fit and even my maternity clothes were getting tight. Who wants their realtor showing them houses in sweats and running shoes? I did work right up until I gave birth and that helped pass the time. If you take too much time off before delivering all you can think about is being pregnant and praying that the baby will come. I do have to say that you should make sure to have your hair cut/colored and get a pedicure a week or so before your due. You'll be happy you did. Just be sure the pedicurist uses cool water...we don't want even more swelling!

The Big Decision

In a few days I will be 31. Wow, my life sure has changed since my 30th birthday. My husband and I will be married 7 years this summer. We both knew we always wanted kids, but when we married we wanted to wait a while. We enjoyed travelling, movies, nights out with friends and those things were much easier without children. We had time and always pushed having kids out into the future. When I turned 30 I guess I sort of felt my biological clock ticking. We would probably want more than one child, so we decided to try....well, stop preventing anyway. I thought it may take some time to get pregnant, but what did I know? Two weeks later and sure enough I'm pregnant. So, this Saturday night I will be celebrating my 31st birthday and our baby girl will be 10 weeks old. We will probably go to the same wine bar near our house that we were at last year, but now I need to find a babysitter and be very careful how much I drink. There is nothing worse than taking care of your baby with a raging hangover!